RUMOR MILL

The Rumor Mill is an absolutely necessary part of every newspaper, and here you will find plenty of hearsay about your fellow residents – and perhaps even yourself one day! So when you are enjoying your time in town, do be wary… There may be someone nosing around your business, there is always busybody creeping about somewhere, and the walls have ears! Whisper your rumors in complete confidence (until press day of course) to Fern Barker. Rumors are printed as soon as possible from the moment they are heard.

July 26th

A certain gentleman of high status has brought it to our attention that the East Coast Syndicate currently financing the construction of a new hotel in Bushside may have conveniently created that opportunity for themselves. When pressed for details, he became cagey, but left us with the titillating question, “It’s almost like they were just waiting for the previous hotel to be gone. But how would they have known?”

 

July 19th

Rumours are running rampant concerning the whereabouts of arsonist Bill Chadwick. A new resident in town reported the sighting of a strange man in an overcoat at the tram depot and believes this could be the man, while other residents are claiming to have seen Chadwick and that he has one ear bigger than the other. Still others claim that he is disguising himself as a trapeze artist or clown and fleeing the region with a passing carnival troupe.

May 9th

One woman has stated that she believes there is something other than cream in the local soda fountain. She goes on to say that due to the cavernous space of those freezers, it is highly likely that ‘someone’ needed to keep ‘something’ on ice, that would be the best place for it. Was this woman speculating on the recent murder in Bushside?

Friends of Amanda Zurivost, who placed a notice some weeks ago to enquire as to her missing father’s whereabouts, say the young woman has now gone missing as well. One of them suggested that she may have ‘crawled up underneath her house and taken pills’, but another insists Miss Zurivost is not the kind of woman who would take her own life.

Several large and unexplained mounds of dirt have been seen behind the local perfume factory, which locals are now connecting of their own accord with the recent murder case. Are these makeshift burial plots for more murder victims?

Rumor has it that local small-time detective Miss Trolley Trollop has been in Philadelphia to see a clairvoyant or spirit concerning several cases she is handling. Is there more to this than mere superstition?

April 7th

A young boy was seen wandering through the residential area of Philomenaville. According to our source, it appears he is looking for a place to stay, though how he might afford one as an unemployed child of 6 or 7 years old, remains to be seen.

A ghost was spotted in the local schoolhouse last week by a young woman who has asked not to be named. She claims to have seen the ghost float in and remove the teacher’s apple from the desk. No further information could be obtained from our source as she fainted upon telling us this much.

March 14th

Two identical vehicles registered to the same owner were found outside the local ice cream parlour on Friday evening. It is believed that the owner accidentally ‘rezzed several copies’ of the vehicle and completely forgot of the existence of these two extra vehicles, his or her attention fully and quite scandalously focused on the joyride at hand.

A well-to-do woman has moved into one of the charming houses in Wellington County. It seems she is a spinster of means, judging by the quality of tea served during our informant’s visit. An old man sporting a monocle and a pet parrot was seen entering the woman’s home. It is believed they were discussing the merits of various items of furniture.

One young woman claims to have bought every single item from the recent Merchant’s Choice fair. According to close friends, she is rather a spendthrift at her husband’s expense, and it is expected that he will declare bankruptcy in a matter of weeks.

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